Wednesday, March 30, 2011

The Wilderness


In the wilderness, it is easy to find myself
Scratched up, stumbling,
Always trying to climb up or over or out.
It is a place of straining to find light –
Hope, joy, and freedom.
There are times when I realize
I have just been walking in circles,
Rehashing the same laments,
Examining the same scars,
Asking the same questions –

Are You still there?
Which way are You leading me?
Will this pain end?

Sometimes I just sit for a moment,
Laying back and looking into the trees
And through the tangled briar,
But despite my confusion,
My struggles,
My heartcries,
I know that this wilderness,
This brokenness
Is necessary for freedom.

You must tell me the stories behind my scars
So that I might see how You were there all along.
So that I might see how Your redemptive love
Transcends tragedy and emptiness and unfulfilled
Expectations.
Sometimes this wilderness feels lonely,
But You have assured me that Your hand is
Outstretched.
You have assured me that Your hand is secure.
You have assured me that I am never alone.

Wilderness

Linking up with Tiffini for Word Women Wednesday.
And
Emily for Imperfect Prose

15 comments :

  1. Love your writing, love your drawing, love your love for God!

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  2. You write so pretty-ly. And I love your trees :)

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  3. "This brokenness
    Is necessary for freedom."

    Such beautiful poetry. So glad you wrote and shared.

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  4. Oh Jen...this is so sweet and beautiful...I love this side of you and when you share things like this:-) thank you for this! thank you always...so happy to have you in my life even when I will soon be thousands of miles further...you'll still be here and I can find you:-)

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  5. "You have assured me that I am never alone." Your journal page is encouraging as well thank you.

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  6. Ok...finally coming to visit! me and you and the wilderness...Jen - this I know...He is and will speak to you. It is in different ways for each one of us because we are so unique in our makeup. I can of course share how He has spoken to me but I just want to hug you and let you know that you are hearing and moving and He will make all of this beautiful! I can so relate to this...you know:)
    xo

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  7. This is terrific, Jen. Something about the way you wrote this felt both open and fresh. I feel like I'm camped on my own Plains of Moab after 11 years in the wilderness. There are so many things you talked about here that my heart recognized: the stumbling, the scratches, walking in circles, emptiness, (re)examining scars until I learned from Him their story. I also needed to reveal the still bleeding wounds (not fresh just unhealed) and let Him turn them into scars. It's a hard place, the wilderness. But as you write, this place "is necessary for freedom." And He is here, with us. I want that to be what counts the most.

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  8. this is great...i totally feel you in this..and the third stanza has a lot of wisdom in it...

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  9. "So that I might see how You were there all along"
    i think this is grace. we each have our own wildernesses and experience them differently, but to know, to really know, at the end that he was there all along... it can be so hard, so thorny/windy/wild but grace is often raw like that, eh?
    beautiful

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  10. wow - your words really impacted me today. Thank you for sharing your creativity

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  11. You must tell me the stories behind my scars
    So that I might see how You were there all along.
    So that I might see how Your redemptive love
    Transcends tragedy and emptiness and unfulfilled
    Expectations.

    Amen. I needed these words.

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  12. Lovely, and so tender, vulnerable.
    The world is hard; God is good.
    Hope remains!
    Teri @ StumblingAroundInTheLight

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  14. This brokenness
    Is necessary for freedom

    oh jen... this post bleeds him. i found myself resting in your words. i love your place here, friend. xo

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