Here is Bina' story:
It is something I have known since as far back as my memories will take me.
A part of my daily life that was expected...and taken for granted in ways that I can, only now, see through the lenses of perspective and maturity.
God's voice is one that I know...one that I knew even before I knew what it was. He was my imaginary best friend, my Jiminey Cricket and confessor...the one who talked me through scary nights and intense emotional pain...the comfort that existed in the depths of a young heart not always able to express the hurt captured within.
He comes as a voice from within me and yet...somehow...takes over every inch of space around me, leaving me to wonder if others can hear...and often forgetting that they can't (which is awkward when I reply verbally to Him in public...yes. I do.) His tone is one that I recognize in an instant...one that I have argued, cried, and laughed with...one that just is. But as I grew up, I learned to be dismissive and unappreciative of such a gift...often pushing aside the wisdom and strength that comes in such a open relationship out of a lack of understanding of just how special it is.
All that changed a little over a year ago when I was challenged by our Pastor (for a variety of reasons) to lay that gift down...and when His voice stopped flowing like the river it had been, I was left with a silence that rocked me to my core as I hadn't ever had just silence before...and I was afraid because, for the first time in my memory...I was alone.
I pouted and got angry and pouted some more....somehow forgetting that I had volunteered this change...somehow focusing on the silence and not the God who hadn't changed who He is, but rather how He got my attention. I am sad to admit it took me almost a full year to come to grips with the difference in my relationship with Him...but I am excited to say that now, on this end of it, appreciation and respect has filled the tanks that familiarity and passivity once ruled.
Since the moment I laid down my right to hear His voice, I have heard Him speak to me just a handful of times. Too little in some ways, as I miss His tones more deeply than I can express...and yet, just the sound of His arrival is more than I can stand and I find that NOW, after having let go and grown up, I realize just how unworthy I am to have such an honor and He can't even whisper my name without my eyes flooding over with the praise my heart can't seem to hold on its own.
Interested in hearing more from Bina? Check her out by clicking here.
Challenge: Have you ever found yourself starting to take for granted God's voice (audible or not) in your life? Do you still feel the full weight of His words when He speaks to you? Spend a few moments in praise for the times that He has spoken and guided. If you haven't felt God speak to you (in any form before), I challenge you to ask Him to reveal Himself to you and to prepare your heart for how He will move in your life.
Don't forget about these amazing authors of other "31 Days Closer to..." series: