Welcome, friends, for today's edition of Break the Tape. Essentially, our goal is to identify the lies that repeat themselves over and over again in our minds, break the tape that automatically begins plays when ever we feel we've fallen short, and learn a new song to sing in its place.
Meet Kim. Some of you may know her by KD Sullivan. Whatever name you call her, it's always followed by words like thoughtful, soulful, talented, giving. I could go on and on, but the point is clear: this girl will warm your heart and be a good friend to you because she knows the love of Jesus.
Inadequate. Worthless. Loser.
These words have rung in my ears my entire adult life.
I grew up in a wonderful Christian home and my parents empowered me with the belief that I could accomplish anything I put my hands to. I believed them. But years of verbal and physical abuse in my first marriage were quick to tear down the image of confident princess.
It’s sad how easily disassembled a beautiful building can be. My parents carefully built my confidence brick by brick only to have the castle brought down with words catapulted like fiery missiles.
Over the years, I have built onto a different Cornerstone. He is my foundation. Good upbringing is strong, but He is stronger. It’s taken this middle aged mama all of forty-four years to realize that it is okay if in myself I am inadequate, because He is more than enough. It’s fine if someone else doesn’t recognize my value, because He found me worth dying for. As far as being a loser? Victory comes from the Lord, and it often looks like a loss or setback. I can never correctly assess a loss or victory until the finish line of life.
It’s taken years to gain back confidence. I have no confidence in my flesh, for in my flesh I am nothing. But my confidence is in the Lord, and He calls me: